


Beers of the Prophets

by Subatoi_9



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Drunken Shenanigans, Friendship, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-18
Updated: 2016-03-18
Packaged: 2018-05-27 10:24:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,288
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6280783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Subatoi_9/pseuds/Subatoi_9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Miles and Julian get extraordinarily drunk. An epic tale for the ages.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beers of the Prophets

It was inevitable. 

He had to stop Julian from this every time they drank. 

The Doctor's suggestion had become tradition. 

He was always grateful for being able to hold his alcohol better than his friend. 

Miles had always been clear headed enough to stop anything from happening. 

Until tonight...

Tonight, he'd had one scotch too many. 

"Come on, man, I've gotcha!" Chief O'Brien exclaimed. His every move unintentionally, comically exaggerated. 

"Imma trying, Chief. 'Sss hard," slurred Bashir, arms and legs flailing. 

Miles finally just grabbed him by his trousers and pulled him up. 

Glasses shattered. 

Bottles broke. 

"There ya go, Julian," he said as he patted him on his back.

"Ah. Th-thank you, Chief," Julian drunkenly thanked him with as much appreciation as though Miles had just taken a bullet for him. 

"H-hey, J-Julian, can you roll over?"

Julian was draped like a wet noodle. 

Julian groaned with effort. 

"I-I think I need a-a hand, Chief."

"Hang on," Miles said, snorting and giggling as he finally managed to roll Julian over and sit him up with only a few more bottles crashing to the floor. 

"Sh-should we sstand up?"

Miles looked around and stammered, "No, no I think we should just sit up here. I-I think we got ev'ryones attention well enough."

Julian's sloshy eyes took in the crowd gaping at him and Miles sitting on top of Quark's bar. All eyes were on them. 

"Huh. So we have."

"May I have your attention e'rybody!"

"Oh, believe me, Chief," said Quark as he threw up his hands in resignation, "you have it!"

"He's right, Miles. Sssomeone said that already. I think it mighta been you even?"

"Huh. Yer right."

The two looked at each other and then belted out:

"And did those feet in ancient time  
Walk upon England’s mountains green?  
And was the holy Lamb of God  
On England’s pleasant pastures seen?  
And did the countenance divine  
Shine forth upon our clouded hills?  
And was Jerusalem builded here  
Among those dark satanic mills?

Bring me my bow of burning gold!  
Bring me my arrows of desire!  
Bring me my spear: o clouds unfold!  
Bring me my chariots of fire!  
I will not cease from mental fight;  
Nor shall my sword sleep in my hand  
Till we have built Jerusalem  
In England’s green and pleasant land."

There was a mixture of laughing and cheering from the large crowd. 

"Chief, that was incredible," Julian said as he fell off the bar and passed out. 

 

When Julian came too he wasn't quite sure where he was for a moment. Then it hit him. 

"A holding cell?!"

"Not so loud, Julian," Miles said holding onto his pounding head. 

Julian was still a bit confused. Then as the fog lifted his eyes widened. 

"Oh, no."

"Oh, yes."

"Odo to Sisko"

"Oh no," Bashir and O'Brien said in unison. 

*Sisko here*

"They're both awake."

*I'm on my way*

"Chief, Doctor," Odo admonished, "I hope it was worth it."

Both men were now sitting on the bench. Julian sheepishly looked at Miles. 

"Miles."

"What."

"In the future perhaps we should switch to synthale."

Miles slowly turned and just stared at his friend. 

"Ya think?" Miles was getting annoyed. 

"And Miles..."

"What, Julian?"

"It truly was beautiful signing," Julian said as his smile widened. 

They sat there for a beat. Then both started laughing at the memory they'd made. It didn't matter that Captian Sisko was going to be in there to lecture them or worse any minute. They knew what happened was not going to happen again. 

"We'll be old men someday," Miles said laughing, "and we'll be laughing about this night."

"Oh, I'll hold you to that, my friend."

Miles put an arm around Bashir and ruffled his hair. 

"I see you are both full of remorse," Captain Sisko said incredulously. 

Bashir and O'Brien literally froze. Miles still had his arm around his friend and this other hand in Bashir's hair. 

Their smiles gave way to wide eyes and slacked jaws. Neither one was sure how long he'd been there. They both stood up to face the Captain now. 

"Sir," Bashir began. 

"I don't want to hear it, Doctor. What happened at Quark's was inexcusable, especially from senior staff."

"We're sorry, sir. It won't happen again," Offered O'Brien. 

"No, it won't," Sisko continued, "You are responsible for paying for the damage at Quark's."

"We understand, sir," Bashir said in a remorseful tone. 

Captain Sisko took a good look at them. He never would've guessed those two would become such close friends. It was time to be the Captain though. 

"I hope when the two of you are old men you call me so we can all laugh about this. Because it will take at least 40 years before I think two senior officers under MY command behaving worse than 1st year cadets is funny," Sisko said intensely. "Odo, let them go."

With that, Captain Sisko turned and left. 

 

40 years later, the two old men met up on Bajor. 

"Miles! Julian! It's so wonderful to see you," said Vedek Kira

They exchanged pleasantries before being allowed into the Bajoran shrine and into a room with a single Bajoran Orb. 

"Nerys, thank you. This means a great deal to us." Said Julian. 

"Anything for the two of you. I hope you find what you're looking for."

Vedek Kira left them to the Orb. Miles and Julian looked at each other. 

"Julian, nobody's heard from Captian Sisko since the end of the Dominion war. Let's not get our hopes up."

"I know... But he did say to contact him in 40 years. At least we're keeping up our end of the bargain." 

With that Julian opened the Orb. 

They were surrounded by whiteness. 

"Hello? Captain Sisko?" Asked Miles. 

"Captain? It's us. Miles and Julian. You said we should contact you 40 years later....because we were drunk...and that's how long you said it was going to take for--"

"Really, Julian?" Miles interrupted. 

"What? I thought the direct approach was the way to go?" Said Julian, "But fine, we'll just stand here in fog."

Julian and Miles heard laughing. They looked around and then at each other. 

"Chief? Doctor Bashir?"

Captian Sisko hadn't aged a day. 

Miles raised a bottle of old scotch to him. 

Sisko started laughing heartily. 

"Did you two know that Odo kept security footage of that incident?"

"You're kidding?" Said O'Brien. 

Sisko laughed, "When Julian fell off the bar at the end I completely lost it!"

"He's not kidding, Miles."

"Who else watched it?" Asked O'Brien

"And more importantly, can we get a copy?" Bashir asked. 

Sisko laughed, "It pleases me greatly to see you both have remained close after all this time that's passed for you."

"Sir-"

"Please, call me Ben."

"Ben, when are you coming back?" Asked Miles. 

"Yes," said Julian. "Where have you been...Ben?"

Miles shot him a look. Julian had a smile wanting to break free. 

The Emissary looked at them both and laughed. 

"I wasn't sure when I was supposed to return, but when I realized why you'd come-" Sisko completely lost it laughing so hard, "I was told by the prophets to wait for the--" Ben was trying to talk through his laughter, "for the foolish old men who can't sing!"

Ben continued to laugh while Miles and Julian looked in disbelief. 

"I thought we sounded quite good actually," Julian said with feigned indignation. 

"Seems the Prophets disagree," Miles chuckled. "That night was epic wasn't it."

"Tell everyone I'll be back soon.", Said a still laughing Emissary, "Other than that, what happens in the Orb, stays in the Orb. Now, let's open that bottle and teach me that song, old men. That's an order!"


End file.
